This article was originally posted on the Huffington Post by Caroline Knorr, Common Sense Media parenting editor.
From the iPotty to The Smurfs 2, 2013 gave us some real stinkers. And attention-grabbing stories about cyberbullying and sexting seemed to dominate the news.
But for a lot of parents, the negative headlines don't track with their families' experience of technology. Many folks are seeing their kids learn, grow and benefit from innovations in the tech world.
There comes a time in every parent's life, when he or she realizes they start sounding like an old person. It's a sobering moment. One when you hear yourself talking about "back in my day" or "when I was your age" and you begin the long and arduous path of beating a dead horse with tidbits of what made your generation better than your children's.
With so many ways to access the Internet, including mobile phones, game consoles, music players and tablet devices, people have unprecedented access to information and computing capabilities. Unfortunately, email, social networking, chat rooms and instant messaging expose kids to online relationships that may be harmful and can turn dangerous when online predators are involved. Families need to be vigilant and understand the dangers and how to protect against them.
Raising teens can be an uphill battle sometimes. You want to be a fair, and respect boundaries. This will give them freedom to make their own choices, and learn from their mistakes. Yet, it's your responsibility as a digital parent to protect your kids as best you can.
Popular Social Media Networks Teens Use
Every parent has heard of Facebook and Twitter. Most even have their own profiles on one or both. But, would you be shocked to find out that your teen is probably using social media networks you probably know nothing about? Here's a list of just some of the most popular social media site teens used in 2013:
Meetme
The endless advancement of Internet technology has put complacent parents on notice. These days, it's not only possible, but actually quite easy, to invite strangers into our homes thanks to the power of social media. Knowing when, how, and with whom our children are interacting during the time they spend online is going to be even more important in the coming years.
It might seem harmless enough to allow children onto their favorite social media sites, but there are a number of important safety measures to take before you allow them access. Here are some cyber security fundamentals to keep in mind.
Social Media Is Only as Private As You Make It
There's good news for parents: social media sites like Facebook have a number of built-in settings to help your child maintain a low profile while they're online. Sit with your child and guide them through the process of setting their profiles to private, including their online photo collection. This is arguably the first and most important step toward ensuring that their personal information stays personal.
Check out this article by the University of Massachussettes Lowell about a recent study involving sexting and recommendations to avoid risky digital behavior.
Research by Assoc. Prof Andrew Harris and Assoc. Prof. Judith Davidson provides concrete data and recommendations related to the use of technology in young adult romantic relationships. Dubbed “sexting” by media outlets, the term involves sharing suggestive photos or messages, mostly by phone. Their paper, “Building a Prevention Framework to Address Teen ‘Sexting’ Behaviors,” details results from their research and provides insights from teens, the group least often consulted about youth behavior and motivations.
“There have been other studies about ‘sexting’ and related behaviors, but they didn’t try to understand what the kids are feeling and how their values influence their actions,” says Harris, who is also the associate dean of Research and Graduate Programs for the College of Fine Arts, Humanities and Social Sciences. “Much of the conversation has been based on limited data and knee-jerk reactions. We found that it is difficult to define ‘sexting’ behaviors and motivations in social context.”
While “lives” can be gained and lost with the click of a button in the online gaming world, everyday real-world lives are being affected by the things that happen in games. Recently the developers of the game, High School Story, made news by adding a cyberbullying storyline into the game. This was done after a call came into their technical helpline that included a player saying she was thinking about taking her own life. Taking into account the competitive nature of games, it is easy (just as in real world games and athletics) for things to escalate into bullying.
This article was originally posted on the Huffington Post by Rachel Busman, PsyD.
I am getting asked more and more in my practice about how to talk to teens about situations that involve racy interchanges on Facebook, sending inappropriate pictures via text, and other Internet situations that spiral out of control. As the social media landscape continues to grow and change, these questions are coming up more and more and parents are looking for answers.
This holiday season there were reports that “smart phones” beat out “toys” as the top gift request from the 18 and under set. With a lot of new phone users out there, now is the perfect time to set some basic rules of the road with your child and really get to know how the phones work before they become an inevitable appendage of your child (and don’t worry, iPhone buyers – a post for you is coming soon).
Today’s smart phones are the house phone, record player, maps, books, and libraries of parents’ youths rolled up into one device that lives with your child 24x7. Rather than being overwhelmed by this technology, parents need to get smart about how to harness that same power to make sure kids are using the phones in a responsible way.
In case you missed it, the New York City Department of Education released some guidelines for social media use. Here is an article from Rebecca Levey, co-founder of KidzVuz.com about why parents shouldn't be so quick to embrace these guidelines. It was originally published on the Huffington Post.
In my Facebook feed today there are a lot of moms sharing the link to the new NYC Department of Education Guidelines for Social Media Use. The local NYC media are also excitedly promoting the new social media guide put out this week. At first glance it sounds great that an administration is stepping in to help kids navigate social media, provide tips and guidance and empower kids to make smarter choices online -- or so you'd think.
My niece has a smartphone.
Up until a year ago, I had a flip phone. And the screen didn’t even work. Once I finally upgraded, my niece had to sit me down and explain all the features of my new phone. Sound familiar to you?
If you’re a parent who still fires up the PC, or thinks they’re tech-savvy because you use a laptop, or even if you navigate well through your apps and smartphone features, beware: Your kids learn faster than you do, especially when it comes to managing their digital footprint on the Internet.
Check out this article written by Dan Tynan, and featured on Yahoo! Tech.
Despite its many flaws, Facebook is a pretty cool way to reconnect and stay in touch with long lost friends and relations. It’s also a relatively safe environment for teens to learn the ropes of digital citizenship – safer, at least, than many of the alternatives.
But parents often have the wrong idea about Facebook and social networks in general. In fact, they have two wrong ideas.
Here is the story of one mother that took to the internet to publicly shame her daughther to teach her a lesson about....publicly shaming. One mother found out her daughter had been cyberbullying peers on the Internet and the following was her response.
This morning, a young girl is getting a taste of the abuse she was apparently serving up to her classmates, thanks to her innovative mother.
Yesterday, reddit user AngryCOMMguy posted a photo (pictured) of a downtrodden young girl holding up a yellow sign. The young girl - who identifies herself as Hailey - is a cyberbully. At least, according to her mother. Apparently, Hailey's mother discovered that her daughter was abusing fellow students (at least we assume it was fellow students and not just some random people), via the Internet. As a result, Hailey's mom decided the best course of action was to have her daughter sell her beloved iPod and give the proceeds to Beat Bullying, a charity that works to combat bullying in all its forms.
Taking a break from this story, I think it's safe to say that this is a time-tested parental move: if your kid acts like a jerk, you take something away from them. Make them feel the sting of their malfeasance.
Would you give your child an iPhone for Christmas? What if it came with a strcit contract? We posted a blog from the Huffington Post earlier this morning about a mom that did just that, and here are her reflections and what she learned one year later.
uKnowKids has realeased another SlideShare! View below to get a great list of the top 10 resolutions that every digital family should make in 2014. Don't worry, these are easy and attainable resolutions that will make this year the safest year yet for you and your children online and on the mobile phone. If you haven't made any resolutions (or even if you have and need some you can definitely keep) this SlideShare is for you!
How Teens Compare Themselves to Others on Facebook
Most teens spend a lot of time glued to their computers and cell phones. Rather than interacting with people directly, they tend to do it through the medium of Facebook. Sure, Facebook can help you keep in touch with people you might not ordinarily meet all the time e.g., people who moved away from the neighborhood or went away to college. It’s nice to be able to know what these people are doing and to keep in touch in some way or the other.
However, teens also tend to use Facebook just to communicate with school friends and see what other people are doing. Many of them read glowing depictions of the lives of their fellow classmates—how much fun they had at a certain party or what a great shopping haul someone brought home. And this makes them feel worse about themselves.
Such an innocuous symbol, right? On it's own, it doesn't mean much. But for parents in the know, what's attached at the end of that hashtag symbol can tell you much about what your child is interested in.
Digital parenting continues to become more complicated all the time as technology become integrated into everyone's lives. Despite some parents finding it a challenge, are they really using technology as a babysitter for their kids? Live Science recently analyzed this idea and found that not all parents are relying on smartphones and the Internet to keep their kids occupied. In some cases, parents use that technology as a way toward reward or punishment for their kids.That Live Science piece also brought up an important point: Digital parenting has become more challenging due to a lack of social rules when it comes to using the technology. Is it possible that a universal set of rules can be set in households so kids use digital technology in responsible ways?
In many cases, kids go on social media on their own while parents are at work and do things under their own accord. If a set of social rules are set early, it's possible those habits could be readjusted.
Your child has been begging for a Facebook page and you have finally decided you are ready to let them have one. The thought of them having their own account can be overwhelming and it can be difficult to know where to start. Everyone wants their children to be safe on the internet and in order to get them started its important you tread lightly. Below are simple steps you can take as part of digital parenting in order to prepare your child for their first Facebook page.
Keep it only family – It is important that in the beginning children keep their page with only family and close friends on their 'friends' list. This will lower the risk of cyberbullying.
Teach them about cyberbullying – Let them know that cyberbullying is not ok and to let you know if anyone is harassing them on the internet. This will also let them know that it is not ok to do it to others.
Think your 7th grader isn't sexting? Might be time to think again.
A new study was published online today by the American Academy of Pediatrics about the sexting habits of at-risk seventh graders.
Here are some of the most shocking statistics:
22 percent of at-risk seventh graders participated in sexting.
17 percent sending texts only.
5 percent sending texts and photos.
Higher perceptions of approval for sexual behavior from parents, peers and the media, higher intentions to engage in sexual behavior, lower emotional awareness, and lower emotional self-efficacy.
